How to Kiss

From the kiss of respect to platonic kiss to a passionate kiss like you see in the movies, bringing your lips in contact with someone else's is a sign of affection that most people enjoy. But since there are many kinds of kisses to reflect the many levels of affection you can have for someone, it can be nerve-wracking! Don't worry, though--this article will go over several kinds of kisses, as well as when, and how, to give them.

Contents

1 Steps 1.1 Before a Romantic Kiss 1.2 The Gentle Lip Lock (Romantic Kiss) 1.3 The French Kiss 1.4 The Platonic Kiss 1.5 The Kiss of Respect, or Worship 2 Common Kissing Issues 3 Video 4 Tips 5 Warnings 6 Related wikiHows

Steps

Before a Romantic Kiss

1. 1
   Get your lips in proper kissing order. The most kissable lips are smooth and sweet, not dry, chapped and tense. The guidelines in How to Get Kissable Lips will help both men and women make their lips look more attractive and inviting. Here are the basics:
   
   
   • Exfoliate your lips to make them soft. You never want your lips hard or chapped and dry.
   • Moisturize your lips to keep them soft.
   • Relax your lips by parting them ever so slightly.
2. 2
   Look inviting and approachable. You might not realize it when you send a "leave me alone" message, so read up on How to Look Approachable. Uncross your arms, keep your hands away from your face, make eye contact, and smile! Similarly, read his or her body language - is this person into you? Or does this person seem uncomfortable?
3. 3
   

   a fish kiss.
   Break the "touch barrier." Touch the person lightly on the arm or shoulder when you're talking. Just make it a quick, innocent touch and don't make a big deal out of it. Holding hands is also a good way to break the touch barrier. (Guys, you may want to read How to Touch a Girl for more ideas on how to break the touch barrier without overstepping boundaries. Girls, you may want to read How to Touch a Guy for advice.) If everything is going well, try kissing the person on the cheek. If you find your lips near their ear (like if you're hugging someone from behind, or whispering something to them) go in for a gentle kiss on the cheek and see how they respond.
   • Please note that the touch barrier is culture dependent. In certain cultures, e.g. Islamic, breaking the touch barrier is a big taboo that can land you in serious trouble. Be very careful.
4. 4
   

   Look at their lips.
   Look at their lips. Make eye contact and then move your gaze briefly down to the person's lips. Then move your eyes back up to meet theirs and smile demurely. You don't have to be really obvious about it. Many people will take the hint, especially if they've read one of the many articles that lists this as a sign that a person wants to kiss or be kissed.
5. 5
   

   Kissing
   Approach for the kiss. Depending on your starting position you may need only to turn your head, or you may need to lean in a bit. You may want to use your hands to gently urge your partner’s body or head into position—you just want to guide his or her movement a little, you don’t want to forcibly move any part of his or her body or hold your partner in an uncomfortable position—but in general you just want to position yourself correctly and let your partner meet you. As you near your partner’s lips, maintain eye contact.

The Gentle Lip Lock (Romantic Kiss)

1. 1
   As your lips make contact with theirs, pucker them slightly and close your eyes. If you "overpucker" your lips will become tense, which is better for the platonic peck (described below), not for romance.
2. 2
   

   Kiss your partner's upper or lower lip gently, then pull away slightly.
   Kiss your partner's upper or lower lip gently, then pull away slightly. Put about an inch or 3 cm between you and your partner's lips.
3. 3
   Open your eyes. Once your gaze meets theirs, smile a little and decide whether or not to go for another kiss. If things are going well, move on to the next step. Or if one or both of you think that's enough for today, pull away, smile, and shift your gaze elsewhere.
4. 4
   Kiss your partner's upper or lower lip again, but this time part your lips so that their lip goes between yours. Apply a little bit of pressure closing your lips as you pull away. You can practice on the length of your finger to get an idea for how much pressure to apply. You can also gently pinch one of your lips between your index finger and thumb to see how it feels to have someone kiss you in this way.
5. 5
   Switch to the other lip. If you were kissing their upper lip, now go to their lower lip, and vice versa. Ideally, as you kiss someone's upper lip, they're kissing your lower lip, and vice versa, and you can go on like this for quite some time, alternating with closed lip kisses.

The French Kiss

Main Article: How to French Kiss

1. 1
   As you are locking and re-locking lips, brush your tongue against your partner's lips ever so slightly. This should make it clear that you want to French kiss. If your partner's tongue does not respond in like fashion or if they pull away, you will have to save the French kiss for another time when you are both ready.
2. 2
   Slowly open your mouth a little bit more and gently push your tongue a little farther into their mouth until the tip of your tongue meets the tip of theirs. Let your tongues brush against each other briefly and gently and then pull it away, back into your own mouth.
3. 3
   Close your mouth a little (not all the way) and open it again to start another kiss. This time you can push your tongue a little further into your partner's mouth, so that more of it brushes against theirs.
4. 4
   

   For a passionate kiss: Put your hand(s) on your partner's face, neck, or hair and hold them close as your tongues meet.
   For a passionate kiss: Put your hand(s) on your partner's face, neck, or hair and hold them close as your tongues meet. Gently suck or nibble on their lips here and there. Breathe deeply. Kiss the person like you just can't get enough of them, and like you might never get to kiss them again.
5. 5
   Finish off a French kiss with a little lip locking (as described in the previous section) or continue kissing, in which case you'll want to read the tips in How to Make Out.

The Platonic Kiss

1. 1
   Turn your head before you lean in. If you want to kiss someone on the cheek, and that someone is at risk of misinterpreting your intentions, make it clear that you're not going for the mouth by turning your head off to the side before you lean in.
2. 2
   Pucker your lips more tightly than you would for a romantic kiss. To know if you're puckering your lips correctly, kiss in the air. How loud is the kissing noise? It should be a clearly audible "pop" of your lips as you part them while sucking air in. A romantic kiss will barely make this noise because your lips are much more relaxed.
3. 3
   Keep it brief. The amount of time your lips spend on the other person's cheek or lips should be limited to whatever it takes to make that kissing noise described in the previous step - nothing more. If your lips linger, it won't seem so platonic. In some settings, it might be appropriate to not make any lip to skin contact at all; read up on How to Air Kiss.

The Kiss of Respect, or Worship

1. 1
   

   Kiss of respect
   Bow or kneel before the other person. Look up in respect. Remain in this position during the kiss.
2. 2
   Take the person's hand (usually) gently and bring it close to your lips.
3. 3
   Pucker your lips more tightly than you would for a romantic kiss. To know if you're puckering your lips correctly, kiss in the air. How loud is the kissing noise? It should be a clearly audible "pop" of your lips as you part them while sucking air in. A romantic kiss will barely make this noise because your lips are much more relaxed.
4. 4
   Keep it brief. The amount of time your lips spend on the other person's hand should be limited to whatever it takes to make that kissing noise described in the previous step, no more. In some settings, it might be appropriate to not make any lip to skin contact at all; read up on How to Air Kiss.

Common Kissing Issues

• The bad kisser. So that new guy or girl in your life is just perfect. Kind, caring, fun, exciting--he or she has it all. Except... Oh, what a terrible kisser! Luckily, most bad kissers can become good kissers if you have a little patience, tact, and courage. Check out How to Deal With a Bad Kisser.
• Kissing someone who's much taller or shorter than you. Got a sore neck from looking up at your partner? Or are you always hunching so you can see eye to eye? Don't fret. There's a way to pull this off. Read How to Kiss Somebody Who Is a Different Height.
• Bad breath. This is one of the worst thing to deal with when kissing someone. Read How to Get Rid of Bad Breath.
• Got braces? It's not dangerous, and the odds of getting linked braces are very small, but here are a few precautions: How to Kiss With Braces

How to French Kiss

You have seen it done often in the movies and probably on the street in darkened corners. The French kiss is a timeless and passionate gesture of romantic affection. Whether you live in Paris, France, or Paris, Texas, you can learn how to kiss like the French do without an embarrassing faux pas!

Steps

1. 1
   Moisten your lips. Dry lips do not move well together. Just a light brush of your tongue over your lips right before you kiss will be sufficient to moisten them. Don't lick your lips all the time, though, as this can dry them out further. Instead, use lip balm regularly. You never know when someone will go in for the smooch.
   
   
2. 2
   

   Angle your face.
   Angle your face. If your mouths meet dead-on, your noses will get in the way, and you will not be able to kiss deeply or smoothly. To avoid this, tilt your head slightly to one side. Make sure you do not both tilt your heads to the same side.
3. 3
   Close your eyes. As you approach for the kiss, look into your partner's eyes, but, once you are close to theirs, close your eyes. It can be a bit of a turnoff to be kissing and going cross-eyed. However, you don't need to always close your eyes; some people enjoy keeping their eyes open and seeing their partner when kissing.
4. 4
   Start with a gentle and soft closed-mouth kiss. The French kiss is an open-mouth kiss, but do not lunge in with your lips agape like you're going to eat them; instead, open your lips very slowly. If you were learning to speak French, you would probably start with the basics, vocabulary and grammar, before trying to write poetry. Well, the French kiss is like the poetry of kissing, and before you can be good at it, you have to master the closed-mouth kiss. Even after you have added French kissing to your romantic repertoire, it is usually better to start a kiss with closed lips.
5. 5
   

   Go Dutch on the decision to French.
   Go Dutch on the decision to French. Kissing should be a shared decision. You need to have permission to French kiss someone, but when your lips are locked with theirs you may not want to stop and ask, "Hey, this is great, but can I put my tongue in your mouth?" Open your lips slowly and just a little during the kiss so that one of your lips is sandwiched between theirs and one of theirs is between yours. As you are locking and re-locking lips, brush your tongue against your partner's lips ever so slightly. This should make it clear that you want to French kiss. If your partner's tongue does not respond in like fashion or if they pull away, you will have to save the French kiss for another time when you are both ready.
6. 6
   

   Explore with your tongue.
   Explore with your tongue. If you and your partner seem to be enjoying the open-mouth kiss, slowly try to open your mouth a little bit more and gently push your tongue a little farther into their mouth. The tongue is very sensitive, and the mere act of touching your partner's tongue with your own will be very pleasant. Do not stick your tongue too far into the mouth, as this can be a big turn-off. Instead, just gently and playfully touch tongues. Start lightly. Usually, if the other person wants more, they will come and get it.
7. 7
   Go slow. Passionate kisses are good sometimes, but to really enjoy a French kiss, you must take it slow. Do not hurry and instead, take time to explore each other's mouths.
8. 8
   Breathe. If you’re kissing for an extended period, it’s easy to forget to breathe. Believe it or not, gasping and turning blue is not romantic. Take small breaths through your nose as you kiss. As you and your partner grow comfortable with the kiss, you can try breathing through your mouth a little: sharing breaths as well can be romantic (but not everybody likes it).
9. 9
   Mix it up. Kisses are like snowflakes: no two are exactly the same. Once you feel comfortable French kissing someone, it is tempting to try to do the same thing every time. Add variety. Sometimes kiss deeper, for example, and other times pay more attention to the lips than the tongue. Hold the kiss longer or shorter and explore the art of kissing.
10. 10
    

    Use your hands.
    Use your hands. While you should keep your hands polite, especially on a first kiss, you don’t necessarily want them just dangling at your sides. As a general rule, start with your hands on your partner's hips and then slowly move them around their back or up to the face and hair. Another turn on for the first kiss is to gently caress their shoulder while you kiss. It shows you are comfortable with him/her. Gently hold your partner's face with your hands on their cheeks and their neck, or wrap your arms around your partner in an embrace.
11. 11
    

    Be a gentleman (or a lady) at all times, and you'll be more kissable.
    Read your partner's body language. Everybody kisses a little differently, and each person enjoys different things in a kiss - there is no "right" way to kiss. What separates good kissers from bad is an ability to read a partner's body language and be responsive to their partner. Of course if your partner pulls away or seems uncomfortable at any time, understand that you have to slow it down. Good kissing requires give-and-take, so read your partner’s body language and pay attention to clues (sighs or moans) that tell you you’re doing something he or she likes. Let your partner kiss you back, and move with him or her as long as you’re comfortable with what he or she is doing. Listen for clues that tell how much your partner is enjoying a particular kissing maneuver. If you hear a sigh or moan, or they begin kissing you back with increased intensity, realize that they are responding with fervor.
12. 12
    

    Develop your style.
    Develop your style. Good French kissing, like good kissing of any kind, requires practice. You will get better as you do it more. In addition, the more practice you have with one person, the more comfortable you will feel kissing them and developing a style that suits both of you.
13. 13
    Talk about it. A lot of people have difficulty talking about intimacy, but open communication is important to all parts of a relationship. If you really like the way your partner kisses you, let them know. If you don't like something, also let your partner know that, but approach it delicately and compliment them at the same time on something they did that you liked. Even if the kiss goes all wrong, it can still be an intimate affair if you can both laugh about it together!. Make sure when you kiss you are having fun doing what you are doing. And don't kiss just anyone; make sure it is with someone that you really like and care about.

How to Air Kiss

When you feel uncomfortable kissing someone on the cheek, but feel that something more than a hug is required, an air kiss is an appropriate greeting.

There are times when you're greeting people with whom you are on good enough terms to call for something more than just a handshake or hug, but it's just not appropriate or comfortable to plant a kiss directly on their cheek. In these cases, giving them an air kiss, where you brush cheeks and kiss the air near their cheek, is a good display of social decorum. Made popular by celebrities, who must often mingle and make nice with people they barely know, it's most common on formal social occasions and among friendly, well-mannered acquaintances.

Edit Steps

1. 1
   Know when to air kiss. Consider both the occasion and the nature of your relationship with each person you greet. Typically, a formal event (such as weddings, formal parties, and official ceremonies) that brings together people who are on good terms, but who otherwise don't see each other, is the common setting for air kisses. Less formal occasions (family get-togethers, neighborhood barbecue, and casual lunches) may warrant the traditional hug and lips-on-cheek kiss, especially if you see the person you're greeting on a regular basis.
   
   
2. 2
   Observe how other people are greeting each other. This will give you the opportunity to gauge the formality of the occasion and confirm your judgment about whether this is an appropriate time to air kiss. For example, if you're approaching an entrance and the host is at the door greeting people, see how they are behaving. If your cousin, who's in front of you, gets an air kiss, and you're no closer to the host than your cousin is, then you're probably going to be expected to give an air kiss.
3. 3
   

   Read their body language.
   Read their body language. As you approach, reach out with your hand, whether to touch or grasp their upper arm, elbow, or hand(s). If they recoil or tighten up in any way, it might be wise to consider defaulting to just a loose hug. If they seem relaxed and return your contact, an air kiss is probably in order. And if they embrace you affectionately or touch your face, prepare to kiss and be kissed, traditional style.
4. 4
   

   Lean in for an air kiss.
   Lean in for an air kiss. Aim to bring your lips near their right cheek (unless it's customary in your culture to start with the left). Remain observant, though, that they're going for your right cheek, because if they go for your left cheek and you go for their right (or vice versa) there may be an awkward halt as you both realize your faces are about to crash together. As you're going in for the kiss, it's not uncommon to brush cheeks gently.
5. 5
   

   Kiss the air next to their cheek.